Reverse Vegas, the Pastor, and the Miracle Man

by Dr. Rob Rutledge

When my boss asked me to give a talk at an African-Canadian prostate cancer support group he has organized here in Halifax, little did I know what great pleasure was in store for me.

Rocco Rossi, President of Prostate Cancer Canada, was in attendance that evening, and addressed this lively group of about twenty men in a modest community hall before I gave my talk. Rocco began by describing how he became connected to the prostate cancer world. His uncle at age 53 was diagnosed with an aggressive cancer and later died. This uncle was a ‘man’s man’ – never sharing what was really going on inside, keeping his problems to himself, never reaching out for help. Rocco lamented this as an opportunity lost – men affected by prostate cancer can raise awareness, urge their family and friends to get a screening PSA blood test, and be open about their feelings with their loved ones. He finished in a rousing plea that a prostate cancer support group should be a ‘Reverse Vegas’: while respecting confidentiality of individuals ‘what happens in a prostate cancer support group doesn’t stay in the prostate cancer support group.’

It was heartening for me to hear the message I’ve been sharing with diverse audiences for years. Being open and honest about our emotions is healthy. It connects us deeply with our loved ones. It normalizes the fact that we all can suffer with difficult emotions throughout our lifetimes – and that mental health issues are expectation not a weakness. Rocco confirmed it takes courage and strength to be open with others which ultimately is healing for everyone.

The next person to speak was the Pastor of the local church who was asked to say a prayer before my talk.  Rev. Dr. Lennett J. Anderson is not a big man but his smile lights up the entire room. Here is a man of God who embodies the living spirit. In his prayer, his enthusiasm for life resonates through his voice, taking us into a deep and joyous place. In unison, the group finishes with a heart-felt ‘Amen’.

I can’t stop thinking about the Pastor since hearing him speak. How is it that he lives in this state of joy and peace? The principles neuroplasticity dictate that the way we view the world gets hardwired into our brains. Rev. Lennett has lived a life so full of love and gratitude for the world and everyone in it that the neural pathways to experiencing spirit are deeply engrained while the pathways to the negative emotions have withered away. And yet I feel there is something much more mysterious here. His presence is other worldly, and yet familiar, somehow pointing me to recognize something in myself.

The eyes of the group come to rest on me.  My talk outlines the basics of prostate cancer, screening and treatment. I focus on how prostate cancer cells are usually very slow growing, and how men can potentially influence the growth rates of cancer cells through healthy habits like exercise, low fat diets high in fruits and vegetables with Vitamin D, maintaining a reasonable weight and so on. The talk gets interactive very quickly. Lots of chatter. Guys asking about erectile function and their PSA results. PCC President Rocco chimes in with reflections like "the worst cause of ED is death.  No blue pill after that.  We keep you alive and you have options!" Hoots and lots of joking.

After the talk, my boss introduces me to one of the men: his “Miracle” patient. He is a hefty fellow with a twinkle in his eye and an infectious smile who had told the group he has had cancer three times.  My boss clarifies his story: his lung cancer had spread to the bone, a situation that his physician deem incurable. In seventeen years of practice this man’s medical oncologist has never seen another case of someone alive and without evidence of cancer so many years after chemotherapy. I shake this man’s hand and quip “You can’t trust those doctors, they’re about as good as the weatherman”.

Miracles happen.  You’re not a statistic, you’re a person. You can always do better than the average. And you never know the blessings life will show you in the most humble of places.